(Source: insomniaticthoughts, via gotthecureinmycup)
Maybe it’s a lot to ask
but just once do you think you could be the kinda boyfriend that comments on my facebook, or buys me flowers? Okay I’d like it more than just once. You know in a year and a half you’ve commented on my facebook once. You told me to clean your fish tanks in happy aquarium. But like once a week I comment telling you how much I love you, how amazing I think you are, everything. And rarely do I even get a comment back on it. Maybe once every three months. I hate how today is making me feel like I don’t mean a fucking thing to you.
forgive me if i don’t understand
forgive me for i don’t get why
you think its okay to still want to be friends with her.
forgive me if i don’t understand why
i am supposed to be the first person in your life
yet somehow i am almost always subjected
to being number two.
forgive me for not making it clear enough
why i have no reason to trust this girl.
you obviously do not understand or see
all the havoc she wreaks on our relationship
each and every time she contacts you.
part of it yes is me not trusting her,
but i shouldn’t have to.
just like honestly i have no reason to trust you.
i am trying, but i have no reason.
you have given me every reason not to
saying how you miss her,
hiding when you talk to her usually,
checking her facebook constantly,
lying to me about trying to get back with her
while we were on that break.
yes admittedly you did come back to me.
but she wouldn’t take you back either.
so when she wanted you back,
you said no and now you wonder
so often if it was the wrong choice you made.
that’s not putting me as your number one,
when you constantly wonder if someone else
should be in my place.
forgive me if i don’t understand why you’d want
someone so controlling back in your life anyway.
none of your friends like her.
not a one of them.
they all talk about how a conniving little bitch she is.
how she plays the innocent card to anyone she can fool
to get just what she wants.
what she wants is you.
and honestly if you aren’t going to put a fight anymore
neither am i.
because if you can’t make me number one
then i won’t take number two.
no reason you should be able
to have your cake and eat it too.
Just once
it’d be nice to see you stand up for me or defend me to her. Rather than just blow it off or ignoring her comments that have crossed the line.
I wish I meant as much to you as you do to me.
Here we are
right back where we always start. Right where I notice you never tell me I’m pretty. Not even when I have fished for the compliments. I told you today that I could fit into pants from over a year ago. I’d lost two pants sizes. Still nothing. Not even a babe you look good. Nothing. Here is where I sit around and wonder why I still give you another chance to fix this. To make things better. And yeah it works for a little while but we always end up right back here.
